Thursday, 23 June 2011

Reasons Why Emoticon...Controlling Boyfriends

The love interest of a story is always a MAJOR sticky point for me and although I may love a book I have on some occasions found myself hating it just because of the guy (this does sort of tie in with the love triangle thing a little).

A guy can be protective all he likes but as soon as he reached the point where he is controlling and manipulative in getting the heroine to do what HE thinks is ‘best’ his rating in my mind hits rock bottom.

I can understand the guy wanting to keep the girl he loves safe and all that jazz but sometimes he goes around it is totally, completely and utterly the wrong way – yes Edward I am talking to YOU!

And what makes me sick to my stomach is that the heroine will just go along with it. And often feels as though it is justified on the boy’s part. WHAT IS WITH THAT!?

In fact these kind of relationships makes me extremely uncomfortable, because I can’t help but classify such a manipulation of someone's actions under psychological abuse. Maybe I am wrong in viewing it this way but it makes me shiver. I can’t help but wonder if this girl is going to be able to make ANY decisions concerning her own life five, ten, fifteen years from now if she stays in this relationship? Or will her will power be battered into nothing by the constant controlling presence of her ‘true love’?


  1. I hear you!

    Controlling is such a turn off.

    That's why I love guys like Jonah Griggs, who is practical and protective but never tries to take over his girl's life, much as he loves her he knows his own boundaries.

    That makes for a great leading man, I think.

  2. +JMJ+

    I'm afraid Edward isn't listening. LOL! ;-)

    I don't think you're wrong in viewing it the way you do, but I confess that I don't really mind controlling heroes. =P The nature of the Romance genre means they're exposed before the end, anyway, and have to work out a better arrangement; so they're not completely awful. Oh, wait. Are we talking about them or about the ones whom the authors allow to be controlling to the very end? Because that changes things. ;-)

    I think our perception of the hero's behaviour hinges very much on the heroine's reaction to it. If he had tendencies to be a controlling jerk (for we all have our faults), but the heroine stood up to him when she needed to, I don't think we'd mind too much. But if she just lay down like a rug and let him call all the shots, well, then, yes, we'd have a problem!

  3. @Enbrethiliel

    We are talking about those that are controlling to the very last and don't change at all.

    They are the kind that I want to run over with...I don't know, something heavy and damaging lol


  4. @ Alex (A Girl, Books, OtherThings)

    Jonah Griggs from Jellicoe Road? Man, I have been desperate to read that, now I will have to find it! :)


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